TITUS: maybe a more normal question... do you have a favorite constellation?
PAINTER OF THE NIGHT: they're like children to me. how could I have a favorite?
T: (silence) ...
POTN: (after a long sigh) fine. ursa minor has my heart, they are the most fun to draw by far each night.
T: thank you for your honesty. I'm sure that was... very hard to admit.
POTN: mhm.
T: ...wait, isn't that just the litter dipper?
POTN: ursa minor.
T: ...little di--
POTN: ursa. minor.
T: ursa minor. got it.
TITUS: ahh, finally, we're at the last question!! well, I skipped a few but... that doesn't matter. anyways! how long have you been painting for, and how much longer will you do it?
PAINTER OF THE NIGHT: it's been quite a few years since I started. or maybe... a lot of years? I don't remember. I'll be "painter of the night" until the day comes that I no longer have the strength to pick up my brush.
T: (silence) ...
POTN: (visibly confused) what?
T: is that all?
POTN: I think so, yes.
T: oh. well, good luck to ya then!
TITUS: do you have anything to say to your fans?
PAINTER OF THE NIGHT: why would I... okay. I haven't done this sort of this before, but... to my fans. please don't die on me. on even the hottest of days, I can count on you to cool me down. even the cheapest fans work wonders. thank you for everything, I'd be a sweaty mess without you.
T: I... you... (silence)
POTN: is something wrong? that was all I had to day.
T: n-no, no, I think you misunderstood... no, you know what, that was a beautiful message. thank you. your fans will appreciate it.
POTN: that is an odd thing to say about inanimate objects, but alright. I feel like I've learned to appreciate the little things in life more from saying that out loud today. I should do that more often.
T: (smiling without emotion)
TITUS: ...this turned into a trainwreck, but we're out of time. tune in next week for an actual interview. bye bye now! (waves)
TL;DR: the ominous "painter of the night" is actually a normal man with a normal life, contrary to popular belief.
